8 Key Life Lessons I've Learned as an Entrepreneur
As we often hear, life is a series of lessons—-as an entrepreneur, even more so. Here are key lessons I’ve learned in (2024) that I’m holding on to dear life.
As we often hear, life is a series of lessons—as an entrepreneur, even more so. Here are 8 key lessons I’ve learned in (2024) that I’m holding on to dear life.
1. Networking is key 🔑 Literally your net worth!
2. People change. Goals change. Dreams change. Don't let people box you into who you once were if you no longer align with that version of yourself. Accept it and be free.
3. Cutting out alcohol is really a game changer. Never felt better!
4. It's okay to be misunderstood. Those who get you get you. Rather have two friends who "get you" than several friends with whom you constantly have to explain yourself to about every little thing. Align with those who align with you in the season you're in.
5. If a goal seems too big to accomplish, take a deep breath and break it into small deadlines. Little by little, day by day, work on it. Don't give up. It'll eventually get done.
6. WORK in SILENCE. You can be surrounded by people and be social, but keep your precious goals/plans/dreams to yourself! Grind first. Talk/show when it's time.
7. Exercising regularly is the perfect recipe for endurance, energy, and overall peace of mind, especially as a busy mama.
8. Do not force things. i.e., relationships, friendships, opportunities, etc. The minute you stop forcing it, you'll have so much peace!
Which will you be adapting this year?
Congo, Christianity, & Colonialism: I finally finished The Poisonwood Bible
It took me almost two years to finish reading the novel, The Poisonwood Bible, and, trust me, I have a lot to say! I hope to capture all my thoughts precisely. I do appreciate the way the author wrote about the history of Congo in such depth: covering colonialism and post, missionaries in the Congo, political situations, etc.
It took me almost three years to finish reading the novel, The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver, and, trust me, I have a lot to say! So much so that I am dedicating a full blog post about it! And I hope to capture all my thoughts precisely.
The novel is about a missionary family: Nathan Price, the Baptist evangelical, his wife, and his four young daughters, who go to the Belgian Congo in 1959 to bring the Gospel to the Congolese people—and show them “the way.” They arrive in the fictional village called “Kilanga” and are unprepared for “the village life in the jungle”. According to the missionary family, the Congolese people are uncivilized and ignorant, and so on. The book covers three decades in the Congo.
My overall criticism/thoughts
All in all, I do appreciate the way the author wrote about the history of Congo in such depth: covering colonialism and post, missionaries in the Congo, political situations, etc. I highlighted so much—So many great sentences/quotes!
“Now everyone’s pretending to set the record straight: they’ll have their hearings, while Mobutu makes a show of changing all European-sounding place names to indigenous ones, to rid us of the sound of foreign domination. And what will change? He’ll go on falling over his feet to make deals with the Americans, who still control all our cobalt and diamond mines. In return, every grant of foreign aid goes straight to Mobutu himself.”
There was a lot of truth regarding the ugly politics in the Congo or cultural observations. Sadly, the political situation hasn’t changed much, even the Congolese people's mentality regarding the survival mindset, i.e: bribing etc! So accurate, and it pains me to write this, as someone with Congolese roots. This is why I wanted to write this review from the point of view of someone who loves reading fiction and happens to have ties to Congo.
“The same argument is made by telephone operators, who’ll place a call outside the country for you only after you specify the location in Kinshasa where you’ll leave l’enveloppe containing your bribe. Same goes for the men who handle visas and passports. To an outsider it looks like chaos. It isn’t. It’s negotiation, infinitely ordered and endless.”
“She’s explained this to me a dozen times, but it only sinks in as I come to see for myself what it is, this life. Anybody who needs anything in Kinshasa—a kidney-stone operation or a postage stamp—has to bargain for it, shrewdly. The Congolese are used to it and have developed a thousand shortcuts. They sum up prospects by studying each other’s clothing and disposition, and the bargaining process is well under way before they open their mouths to speak. If you’re deaf to this subtle conversation, it comes as a shock when the opening bid seems to be, “Madame, I request from you three thousand zaires.” I’ve heard foreign visitors complain that the Congolese are greedy, naive, and inefficient. They have no idea. The Congolese are skilled at survival and perceptive beyond belief, or else dead at an early age. Those are the choices.”
Christianity in Congo
I know firsthand the stronghold that missionaries and Christianity have had (still have) in the Congo. However, the author downplayed it a bit. In the Kilanga village at least, it seems that most people rejected the Gospel, according to the author. But she missed the opportunity to write about how the Gospel was widely accepted before & during Mobutu’s regime—and is still the most respected and popular religion in Congo. Congolese have since been brainwashed into “waiting” for Jesus to change the nation—without action—while “foreigners” continue to loot natural resources (Yes, the political situation is more complex than that: The Belgium government and American government played a big role in it as well—and Congo’s very own greedy leaders—but the focus of this section is religion). Side note, I write a bit about this in my own work.
“Like a princess in a story, Congo was born too rich for her own good, and attracted attention far and wide from men who desire to rob her blind. The United States has now become the husband of Zaire’s economy, and not a very nice one. Exploitive and condescending, in the name of steering her clear of the moral decline inevitable to her nature.”
Regarding Nathan Price, the Missionary who brought the Gospel to the “villagers” in the book—he was obsessed with baptizing children and shoving the bible down everyone’s throat. He was very intense and manipulative—to the point that it resulted in an unfortunate tragedy (No spoiler). As we know, many Baptist missionaries tried to convert Congolese or Africans in general to Christianity and encouraged them to leave behind their traditions, witch doctors, and“fetishes.” But the book made it seem as if Nathan Price wasn’t successful at all—in his mission—when I know firsthand how Christianity was indeed accepted as the “main” religion in Congo. Nathan Price’s character was so extreme towards the end that it was hard to believe it, unfortunately. Almost comical.
Unrealistic Scenario during the Congo Crisis/Revolution- Post-colonialism
One thing that bothered me was how unrealistic things in the Congo were portrayed at times. For example, a white mother leaving her daughters behind in the Congo during a very crazy time—1961/1962! Alone! During the “Independence Movement” and after Lumumba was killed, most whites were practically chased out or worse. It is too difficult to imagine a minor (Leah) would have been left behind—in an African village! And she was sick? Okay, yes she had Anatole (her male Congolese friend/boyfriend) but the whole situation was just unrealistic, given how crazy things were during this period (I wasn’t there, obviously, but from what I know).
I want to be oppressed vibes!
In the years to come, after deciding to stay in the Congo with her boyfriend/husband, Leah, one of the daughters, went on and on about how she was poor, hungry, and miserable—even though she had the option to leave the Congo and have a better life. It is hard to believe her husband would stay in those circumstances WITH CHILDREN when they had the option for a better life—for their kids. It irritated me so much because this is what you call self-inflicted suffering.
It is so obvious that this was written with the mindset/mentality of a white woman trying to speak for Congolese people. I appreciated Leah’s desire to fight for justice or hope for true freedom or independence for Congo, but at times it screamed: “I want to be oppressed.” Leah and Anatole had the chance to start fresh in the US, but they went back to Congo during Mobutu’s regime! When Anatole was a wanted man for being pro-Lumumba? That is so laughable! Congolese were doing the total opposite during that time—no matter how much of a pro-Lumumba activist they may have been, they were fleeing! Therefore, it is so unrealistic for Leah and Anatole to choose not to stay in America because people were criticizing the scars on her husband’s face or because they had a hard time adjusting to life in the US. Ask any immigrant who has *truly* suffered: that is a minor disadvantage—especially then! Congolese were fleeing with no return!
But I guess the author had to do it for the plot. Or else, how would we know and see Leah’s character arc in the Congo?
The oldest sister was an open racist, but the most entertaining character.
From the beginning, Rachel wanted to leave Africa so badly, but now years later (70s/Mobutu regime), she conveniently inherited her late husband’s hotel in Brazzaville and is so suddenly happy to stay. For so long? I didn’t buy it. Because most “foreigners” eventually left, even for just a break, and then maybe returned. So here you have a white (single) American woman in her 40s/50s, running a hotel in Brazzaville during a very turmoil time in the history of Congo—and never ever leaving the continent—it was too hard to believe.
Lastly, in the end, 20-something years later, the mother and daughters return to the continent and the narrator mentions that this was during the African War.
“In the six months since they began to plan their trip, the Congo has been swept by war.”
I am laughing again because, once again, this family conveniently and comfortably seems to be in the Congo during its most traumatic times—during another crisis: the war. They are somehow not afraid of being in danger and feel confident that they can just find their old little village of Kilanga when the country is torn apart?? Maybe I missed something because the narrator did not mention the exact location they were at in this scene, but the Congo and all neighboring countries were in turmoil during the African War.
When so many Congolese families were getting killed or trying to flee the country…this nice white American family was gloating away, speaking Kikongo with sellers at a local market.
On what planet were they on?!
Foreign language issues were distracting.
To add on: Some foreign languages used weren’t a good portrayal of how people spoke, especially if they lived in Kinshasa. Her children were going around saying “Sala Mbote”? I have never heard anyone greeting others saying: “sala mbote” and I grew up with Congolese parents. It would just be: “mbote.”
Maybe it’s just me though and it is a thing?
Conclusion
The book started super slow, but I was intrigued when it picked up at the 150 mark or so until the 300 pages or so. If the book had wrapped things up right around the time Mobutu came into power, post-colonialism, it would have made so much sense. Everything after that made no sense to me whatsoever.
I do appreciate the author writing about Congo and its history, and emphasizing the negative effects that Christianity may have had on the Congolese people; however, when I got to the end of the novel, I was angry and frustrated.
Maybe that was the point?
Mid-Year Book Roundup: The Best of 2024 (So Far)
June is here! I’m currently writing a new book and am deep in it! I’m briefly snapping out of my fictional world to share my Mid-Year Book Roundup and my favorites (so far), such as Beautiful World, Where Are You by Sally Rooney, Lucky Me by Rich Paul, and La Plus Secrète Mémoire des Hommes by Mohamed Mbougar Sarr. Read on to get inspired!
June is here, so I’d like to share my mid-year book roundup with you all! I will share what I read and discuss in detail what my favorites are so far, such as Beautiful World ,Where Are You by Sally Rooney (Literary Fiction), Lucky Me by Rich Paul(Memoir/nonfiction), and La Plus Secrète Mémoire des Hommes by Mohamed Mbougar Sarr (French Literary Fiction- English: The Most Secret Memory of Men). Technically, I am not done with this last one but only 50 pages or so from finishing it.
We are already halfway through the year! I can’t believe this! I love the month of June because it is my birthday month! I’m currently deeeeeep into drafting a new book and it’s going so well! I’m having fun and am lost in it! I’m briefly snapping out of my fictional world, so….ready?
JANUARY READS 2024
Someday Maybe, Onyi Nwabineli
(Literary Fiction)
Lucky Me, Rich Paul
(Memoir/NonFiction)
Love Across Borders, Anna Lekas Miller
(NonFiction)
Dating Dr. Dil, Nisha Sharma —(Fun fact, I went to grad school with Nisha Sharma, and I’m so proud of the bad a$$ writer she’s become today!)
(Romance)
Before I Let Go, Kennedy Ryan
(Romance)
Favorite Read (s): Lucky Me by Rich Paul
There is so much more to Rich’s story than what the media runs with! Rich Paul, an entrepreneur, is mainly known as LeBron James’ sports agent. As he says in his book, being lucky also means putting in the work. He was already a hard-working man by the time he met LeBron James; thus, his work ethic spoke for itself, which led to greater opportunities. He created his luck by grinding hard—determined to succeed! Then he happened to be at the right place, at the right time, which led to meeting Lebron James. I especially love how he talks about breaking generational cycles of poverty. That hit home!
Favorite quote(s):
Love Across Borders came in second!
As an immigrant, I could relate to a lot of the struggles discussed in this book. I have witnessed many families and loved ones affected and separated by borders, immigration laws, and deportation.
Favorite quote(s):
“The border might not have yet physically divided people the way that it does today, but it institutionalized the white supremacist culture that continues to influence the way that Mexican and Mexican-American communities are treated in the United States to this day.”
“Around the world, hundreds of thousands of people migrate for better work opportunities. But often, I find myself wondering why a European or US citizen who moves to Abu Dhabi or Dubai is often called an expat, typically earning an inflated salary, while a Nigerian or Gambian trying to leave their country to make more money is a “migrant.” Both people are trying to make a better life for themselves. One is risking human trafficking and being sold in slave markets. The other doesn’t have to pay taxes.”
FEBRUARY & MARCH READS 2024
Americanah, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
(Literary Fiction)
The House of Eve, Sadeqa Johnson
(Historical Fiction)
The Paris Library, Janet S Charles
(Historical Fiction)
Beautiful World, Where Are You, Sally Rooney
(Literary Fiction)
The Other Americans, Laila Lalami
(Literary Fiction/Suspense)
Favorite Read (s): Beautiful World, Where Are You by Sally Rooney.
This novel is pretty much about a group of friends in their 30s who live in Ireland and are trying to figure out this thing we call life: career, friendship, love. My love for this book came as a surprise. I’ve heard of Rooney, of course, and I even binge-watched Normal People years ago on Hulu. I didn’t know what to expect with this one, but, wow, she is by far my favorite fiction read of the year. It’s one of those books where I saw myself in a character so clearly! People like me who have a big heart and want or expect people to show us the same love we give them in our own “love language.” But not everyone is built like us. Sometimes, we have to meet people where they are and try to understand **how** they love—in platonic and romantic relationships!
Favorite quote(s)
“Maybe we’re just born to love and worry about the people we know, and to go on loving and worrying even when there are more important things we should be doing. And if that means the human species is going to die out, isn’t it in a way a nice reason to die out, the nicest reason you can imagine? Because when we should have been reorganising the distribution of the world’s resources and transitioning collectively to a sustainable economic model, we were worrying about sex and friendship instead. Because we loved each other too much and found each other too interesting. And I love that about humanity, and in fact it’s the very reason I root for us to survive—because we are so stupid about each other. ”
P.s. Americanah was a re-read. I was curious to know if I’d still see it as my all-time favorite book after 5 years. The verdict: It’s strange how time changes us. Reading this book now felt different, and there were many scenes I had forgotten even happened. I kept wondering if this was a new edition with new scenes. I realized that I am not the same person I was 5 years ago when I first read it. My thoughts on the book have changed! It is still an amazing novel—without a doubt! But I wouldn’t call it my all-time favorite.
April/May Reads- 2024
Dominoes, Phoebe McIntosh
(Literary Fiction)
At Night, Claire Daverley
(Romance)
A Knock at Midnight, Brittany K. Barnett
(Memoir/NonFiction)
When I Think of You, Myah Ariel
(Romance)
Last Place Seen, Alessandra Harris— (My writer friend wrote this book!!! If you’re into thrillers and suspenseful novels, please check it out! Page turner!)
(Thriller/Suspense)
Favorite Read (s): A Knock at Midnight by Brittany K Barnett
My mind is blown. Brittany Barnett, a young attorney based in Dallas, Texas, fought for the freedom of her clients, some serving life sentences without parole. This was a difficult read, but I’m glad I read it. This book is a fierce look into America’s broken justice system (based in Texas). It is not an easy read, so please start the book expecting to get angry, frustrated, and heartbroken. The stories shared sometimes felt so hopeless and unjust. I now have a better understanding of the justice system and how broken it is. There is some light at the end of the tunnel, if I may add. The work she has done is phenomenal and inspiring. As someone who grew up in Texas, it felt almost personal! Highly recommended!
June Reads
June has been SOLID! I’ve been reading like there’s no tomorrow and I’m loving it. Here's what I read in June:
The Exception to the Rule, Christina Lauren
(Short Story/Romance)
How to Say Babylon, Safiya Sinclair
(Memoir/NonFiction)
The Sun Sets in Singapore Kehinde Fadipe
Book club/women's fiction)
La Plus Secrète Mémoire des Hommes by Mohamed Mbougar Sarr
(The Most Secret Memory of Men)
The Poisonwood Bible by Barabara Kingslover. I wrote a full separate review for this one.
Favorite Read(s): La Plus Secrète Mémoire des Hommes by Mohamed Mbougar Sarr | (The Most Secret Memory of Men)
Now and then, I try to read French novels to keep my French fresh! Also, I simply enjoy books written by French writers. They have a different flair than American or UK writers. Technically, I’m still reading this one, and I have taken my sweet time. I’m savoring it, highlighting it, and am amazed by this talent of a writer.
It is about a young Senegalese writer based in France who discovers a mysterious but profound book written and published in 1938 by a young African writer. The book in question caused a lot of commotion in the book scene in Paris, France. Literary professionals claimed that an African writer couldn’t have possibly written it because it was too well written! One day, all traces of the author have disappeared, so now decades later this young Senegalese writer goes on a journey to find out what happened to him.
One of the reasons I love it is because I can see myself in it, as a writer/reader of African descent. I love how we get to know the different types of writers he meets along the way—French writers and those with origins from the motherland: Congo, Mali, Senegal, Cameroun, etc. Just so amazing. As a US-based writer of Congolese descent who was born in Paris, France, I kept thinking “Wow, I found my people—only I’m not there.” In the States, I have yet to meet another fiction writer with a similar background as me. Those I have met are mainly West African writers, so, this book has been so comforting—just knowing that I am not alone in this literary lifestyle I have chosen. I just need to go to France to find my people…haha.
On a serious note, writers are very unique beings! We are not easy to understand, love, or be friends with, yet we continue to do what we do…write…read…because we can’t see ourselves doing anything else.
I LOVE THIS BOOK! This French writer is so talented! I will read anything he writes!
Favorite quote(s)- Citation Francais:
“Un grand livre n’a pas de sujet et ne parle de rien, il cherche seulement à dire ou découvrir quelque chose, mais ce seulement est déjà tout, et ce quelque chose aussi est déjà tout.”
The Exception to the Rule by Christina Lauren came in second.
It was a well-written short story! I ate it up, and finished it in one sitting—in bed on a cozy, Saturday morning! I wish it could be developed into a full-length novel. This romance short story gave me all the feels!
Okay, guys, this is my Mid-Year Book Roundup so far. I hope you enjoyed this blog post! What is a book you’ve read so far that you loved? Also, have you read any of the books on my list?
Costa Rica: Driving From San Jose to Manuel Antonio Beach, Quepos
The drive to Manuel Antonio Beach in Quepos was worth it and simply beautiful: witnessing the natural wonder, discovering other beach towns and small-towns along the way, and seeing the majestic greeneries of Costa Rica, was a beautiful experience.
Is driving in Costa Rica safe?
Short answer:
Yes, driving in Costa Rica is safe, for the most part.
Long answer:
Depends on many factors, such as where you’re headed and how late into the night you’re driving, but read on to learn about my personal experience!
Costa Rica Vibes
So, my family and I had the chance to travel to Costa Rica for my niece’s graduation, who graduated from UWC Costa Rica, a very competitive two-year residential pre-university program. Our hotel was in Santa Ana, San Jose, and we had several days before the event to play tourists.
We stayed in the beautiful Santa Ana Hilton hotel that had a lovely scenery.
If you’re familiar (or not) with Costa Rica, you may know that San Jose isn’t the most touristic city for exploring and adventuring. I hadn’t initially realized how far the beaches were from San Jose. We absolutely wanted to explore—see the beach—for the kids—or visit a National Park to see some nature, or waterfalls, such as in La Fontana. The beach that was recommended by locals was Manuel Antonio Beach in Quepos located in the Parque Nacional Manuel Antonio, 3 hours away. It was voted as one of the top 25 beaches in the world by Tripadvisor’s Travelers’ Choice Award 2019! Given that we had the kids with us, we chose to the beach. La Fontana would have been more ideal with just my husband and I.
Isn’t Costa Rica a Third World Country?
Often when we hear “Third World Country”, we envision the worst. Well, there are levels to developing countries, in my opinion. For a “Third World Country”, my observation was that Costa Rica is still developing, yes, but at least appears to be an organized country with drivable roads— if I were to compare it to D.R.Congo, where driving is a disaster and almost impossible to drive to other parts of the country.
Our dilemma was that we hadn’t exactly planned to drive in Costa Rica and mostly relied on Uber at first. Upon more research, one Uber driver even offered to drive us there (off record, as a private driver). Not to get paranoid, but I had no plans to get kidnapped or worse. Not only that, it would be annoying having to rely on someone if we wanted to move from one place to another, AND he wanted to charge about $200, equally the same price as renting a car for a few days and driving ourselves. The drive was about 2-3 hours. We got his number to be polite but knew we weren’t going to go that route.
Where to get a rental in San Jose, besides the airport?
We got our rental (Avis) from InterContinental Costa Rica at Multiplaza Mall.
Thanks to Reddit, I felt confident that we could just drive ourselves with no issues. Well, there were a lot of comments about safety and chaotic roads, so we were expecting the worst. I should have known better. In my mind, I imagined roads similar to the motherland; hence, Congo, Tanzania… but I was pleasantly surprised to learn that what most Reddit commenters referred to as a chaotic drive m, was a smooth sailing to me, for the most part. We used Waze, and the directions were straightforward. Within 3 hours, we made it.
Beware of scammers/imposters
One comment that helped was that we were warned about the fake “workers” who harass you to park in their parking space but want to scam you into buying tickets you don’t need. They even stood in front of our car, preventing us from driving further. So, when you arrive in Quepos, whatever you do, don’t roll down your window. They are very aggressive. My husband fell for it (lol), and I had to remind him, that: “they are scammers—keep driving!” Eventually, we kept driving and found a parking spot much closer to the entrance of Manuel Antonio National Park. So, yeah, you have been warned!
Entry to Manuel Antonio
Let me rewind a bit, one annoying thing was that because we decided to go to the beach last minute, I got our entry tickets last minute. You must purchase a ticket online because they have dedicated slots and only allow a certain amount of people into the National Park (where the beach is) per slot. Sounds easy? The issue is that you have to create an account and wait for an email confirmation that may take a lifetime to land in your inbox. I registered around 9 PM and didn’t get the link until 1 AM! I was in and out of sleep and kept seeing the slots available decreasing! My kids would have been devasted if I couldn’t get those tickets. We were packed and set to leave at 5 AM. When I finally registered in the middle of the night, I got the last 5 slots for entry at 9 AM. We wanted to get there early, which I’m glad we did because when we did get there, the beach got super crowded after 11 AM.
Anyway, we made it safely, hiked for 30 minutes through the forest/park, spotted some iguanas, monkeys, and finally made it to the beach where my kids played nonstop for 4 hours!
I love the beach for relaxation and reading in nature. With the kids, it’s challenging because I have to keep my eyes on them, but hubby and I rotated “watch-duty.”
We ate lunch at a nearby restaurant—the food was just okay—nothing to rave about. Then later that afternoon, we headed back to Santa Ana, San Jose!
Was the drive worth it?
Absolutely!
The drive to Manuel Antonio Beach in Quepos was worth it and simply beautiful: witnessing the natural wonder, discovering other beach towns and small-towns along the way, and seeing the majestic greeneries of Costa Rica, was a beautiful experience.
Now let me add that it was the start of the “wet season” but thankfully we didn’t get rained on. And was hot! 80+ degrees (in late May).
Do I consider Manuel Antonio Beach a top 25 beach in the world? I’ll report back when I’ve visited more than 30 beaches around the world, but if I’m quite honest, it was beautiful, but for some reason Laguna Beach in Orange County is still one of my all-time favorite beaches so far.
Time for me to explore more, I suppose?
Will I ever go on submission? Revising a novel with a literary agent.
Sometimes, even when you are signed to an agent, your book may not be quite ready for publication or to go on submission. Your book may require more intensive work, years even, of revising until it is ready for submission.
There aren’t enough blogs out there about the writing process and what happens after you sign with an agent. There are a lot of discussions on Twitter, TikTok, Instagram, but where have the blogs gone? So here am I. I’ve decided to start sharing my process. As I write this blog, it would have been 1.5 years since I signed with my literary agent and we have been doing heavy lifting on my novel since. I think we have finally reached a good place, so I want to share a bit of the process so far.
These words are my heart in a book!
I started writing this novel in December 2018.
Exactly FIVE years ago. Five years of people asking me why my book is taking so long to get published and me not having the answers. Lol. Days and nights of nonstop hard work— honing my craft—revisions upon revisions and complete rewrites and ghosting everyone in the process. Getting signed by a literary agent was just the beginning of the real *hard* work.
Sometimes, even when you are signed to an agent, your book may not be quite ready for publication or to go on submission. Your book may require more intensive work, years even, of revising until it is ready for submission. For example, I had to re-write my book from third POV to first, after my agent and I both agreed its true voice was in first. This allowed me to really let go as a writer and be vulnerable. Something I was truly afraid of doing.
We had about three rounds!
The first round, we weren’t really in agreement with what had to be done and I feel that there was a lot of wasted time—especially on my end as I wasn’t giving it my all.
Round two is when I seriously got down to business and changed the POV and re-wrote most of the book.
Round three was the final polish round, the round I have recently completed. The revising was very difficult at times, but I go through it even when I started to question if it was all worth it.
You need someone to champion your work!
My agent has been nothing but encouraging, which makes all the difference! As challenging as the process has been, she has continued to uplift and encourage.
I did the heavy work! But I know that it isn’t over!
Because even after going on submission, if/when the book is bought by a publisher, the editor will still need to work on it and suggest more changes. It may feel like the process is never ending and you’ve gotta be sure this is what you truly want. Some writers simply don’t have the patience.
I’m trusting the process. I know that it will be all worth it in the end. The fact that I have gotten this far is already a big deal. I’m so proud of how far my novel has come & I’m excited for what’s to come!
Stay tuned and sign up for my newsletter for updates!
A glimpse of life in d.r congo
D.R. Congo is a country that is full of beauty, wonder, and mystery. Every time I travel home, I feel renewed and rejuvenated. Here is a small glimpse of life in D.R. Congo. From Kivu: Goma; Bukavu to Kinshasa.
D.R. Congo is a country that is full of beauty, wonder, and mystery. Every time I travel home, I feel renewed and rejuvenated. Here is a small glimpse of life in D.R. Congo. From Kivu: Goma; Bukavu to Kinshasa. Of course, it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. D.R. Congo has a lot of negatives as we all know it, but I tend to focus on the positives on my blog and social media—to paint a different narrative of Congo. We see enough of the negative aspects of Congo, why add more fuel to the fire?
1. Portraits of Virunga Mountain gorillas at Orchid’s in Bukavu.
2. Lunch in Goma- Lac Kivu Lodge
(Goma is known to have the best cheese, sausage, and potatoes.)
3. Primus Beeer
It’s locally brewed beer and my American friend I traveled with drank it every single day.
4. Art by a local artist in Bukavu
5. The best ntaba (goat meat) I’ve ever had in my life.
This goat meat took three hours to make, and we were so over it at some point. I, unfortunately, do not recall the name of this bar; I will have to ask around again, but I can tell you it was the most ratchet rooftop bar in Bukavu. The vibes were great, but the service was horrible. However I was licking my fingers
6. An orange. Yes, it’s green.
7. Ballers hoopin’ on the court in Kinshasa
8. Random wall mural in Goma
9. More food because that’s what I do. Eat. At Lola’s/Rotana in Kinshasa.
Friend plantains and chicken brochette
10. Kinshasa beauty
How I got my Literary Agent! Better yet, how my agent found me!
I had been in touch with my literary agent since 2020 prior to her signing me. I first pitched her/queried her in summer 2020, but she signed me in summer 2022!
I got my literary agent when I wasn’t trying to get one anymore.
My story is definitely one of a kind—quite unique— so I wanted to share because everyone’s publishing journey is so different and you guys have been curious about mine!
In August 2022, I signed with Literay Agent Katie Shea Boutillier of Donoald Maass Literary Agency.
I had known/been in touch with my agent since 2020 prior to her signing me. I first pitched her/queried her in summer 2020, but she signed me in summer 2022!
Let’s back it up a bit…
How did that happen?!?
So I started querying SOME THINGS, SOMEDAY in June 2020, right when (#AmplifyBlackVoices was trending), given what happened that summer with George Floyd and the Black Lives Matter movement. Agents were thirsty for Black voices! I received a lot of full/half requests right away—first 2 weeks— (a total of 15) or so but they all evidently ended up passing. I received some useful feedback but most were confusing and contradicting other comments/feedback received from other agents. Very subjective business. One thing that surprised me was that I was getting the attention of big-name agents, so I knew I was on to something. They all commented that the concept was good, but still, something was missing.
Then one day I queried Katie and received a reply the next day! She enthusiastically requested the full manuscript. I was hyped! And she followed me on Twitter as well. A top Literary Agent? Following me? I was so excited. It only took her a week to read through it. She requested a phone call. I thought for sure she was going to offer to represent me.
When she called, she expressed how much she loved my characters, my writing, my voice, and the story, but that it needed a lot of work. It wasn’t an offer. Instead, she wanted an exclusive Revise and Resubmit (R&R). This meant working with her exclusively for 6 months+ to revise the book with her suggestions and then when revisions were completed and if she was happy with the work, she would sign me. I admit that hearing how much she loved my characters and my writing felt nice.
She was so excited!
I felt legit being validated by a literary agent. She said my writing had a voice. That it was hard to teach a writer that. That the writing was beautiful and poignant. This was all great; however, I didn’t feel that it was the right move for me at the time. Firstly, I was sooooo attached to my story that I did not agree with ANY of the suggestions she made.
Sometimes, when we’re too attached to our work, it can be difficult to be receptive to constructive critisism.
I did not want to change a single thing. That draft was mediocre now that I look back on it, but I did not see it at the time. I decided to keep querying and turned down her offer. I could tell that she was a bit disappointed that it did not work out because she had been so excited about possibly working with me on this novel.
Needless to say I continued with the querying process and when nothing came of it months later, I couldn’t stand my book anymore by September/October 2020. I decided to put it away and work on something new. I had queried about 100 agents/editors by then.
I got a new idea and wrote a new novel and finished it November/December 2020 during NaNoWriMo. I revised it and for some reason this one didn’t appear to need much revising so I started querying in February 2021. I thought the concept was very commercial, trendy, and would land me an agent ASAP since SOME THINGS, SOMEDAY seemed to be too complex.
Oh boy was I wrong. I hardly received any requests. I even queried Katie again with the new book! I had a dream that she was my agent and was sure she would love this one!
Womp Womp.
She wasn’t feeling the new novel and said she had more of a connection with SOME THINGS, SOMEDAY and didn’t feel like the new story was a good fit.
When nothing at all came from querying the new novel, I decided to step away for a bit. I had left SOME THINGS, SOMEDAY alone for a while, so I decided to read it again.
It’s always refreshing to step away from your work and come back with fresh eyes—with a new perspective!
It indeed needed MAJOR work!
I knew what was missing and finally knew how to fix it. I finally understood what Katie and other agents had suggested…her feedback made sense. I started revising again.
I fixed what I could, which was rewriting 70% of the novel!
When I was done and read it back to myself, I had tears in my eyes by the time I finished reading it all. I realized how gripping and heartfelt this story is. Not only is it a coming of age, love story, but it covers many important subjects such as immigration, the African Dream, and the loss of dreams.
I was ready now (I thought!). I queried small presses and a few other agents who had told me to query them again if I revised it, including Katie. Katie said she was still interested in working together on it and would take a look at the changes, but when a UK based Small Press offered me a contract (that evidently didn’t work out months later), Katie stepped back. I was in such desperation to get my book published that I didn’t give her enough time to properly read the updated version again. And she didn’t want to stand in my way so we went our separate ways again. :-(
The contract with the Small Press did not work out. I ended my contract. It was not the right fit for me in the end, so six months after signing, I walked away heartbroken, disgusted, and discouraged about the traditional publishing industry.
In December 2021, I decided to take a break from writing and focus on launching my coffee roasting business KANFUELA. I decided that I’d eventually go back to writing, but I desperately needed a break (I’ve been writing since 2010 on and off). I didn’t want to hear anything about agents or publishers! I was DONE!
Towards the beginning of the month of June 2022, I read my novel for the first time in almost a year and started making small edits to it (mainly adding more descriptions and details). I had just returned from Congo and had more vivid details to add.
I kept thinking about how wonderful of a book it is and was so sad it would probably never get published. It’s the kind of book that just pulls at your heartstrings and takes you on a journey and into the world of the characters: Aicha and Michel are special—and their story is deep. I even told a writer friend (hey Tamarria) this: “I’m beginning to realize that perhaps I wrote this book for me more than anything else.”
I truly believe that.
As writers, we should be writing for ourselves first. You are your first audience.
Write the story you want to read. And that is exactly what I did.
Toni Morrison said it best:
If there's a book that you want to read, but it hasn't been written yet, then you must write it.
I missed writing, but wasn’t ready to query again yet or to start writing a new book. I was mainly reading other writers’ works and supporting fellow writer friends. But SOME THINGS, SOMEDAY was in my heart—daily. I often thought about whether or not I was so foolish to turn town Katie’s offer (The Exclusive Revise & Re-submit), but what was done was done. SOME THINGS, SOMEDAY is a great novel, but I knew it still needed work—work that I no longer knew how to fix on my own. Self-publishing was out of the question. The story is too important—with international appeal—it transports the readers from Dallas to Paris to London to Kinshasa. I knew I needed an agent to take it to the next level—possibly to the big house NYC publishers with possible foreign rights translations in many languages in the future. Can a girl dream? I want the whole thing! :-)
…and then on one random, August afternoon, I received an email from KATIE SHEA BOUTILLIER.
I thought I was tripping!
To paraphrase, she said she normally didn’t do this, but she was thinking about my writing. She asked if I’d ended up signing with the small press and if not, she wanted to know what I was up to writing-wise.
My first thought was: “Girl, nothing. Nothing at all. I’m too hung on SOME THINGS, SOMEDAY.”
My second thought was: “Wow, she reached out to me? Agents don’t do this normally!”
I didn’t say that, of course. I told her that I did originally sign that contract with the Small Press, but that it did not work out and that I’d been taking a break from writing anything new. Also that I had been thinking about the novel she’d loved so very much and had made some changes to it since we last spoke. And was more willing to revise it more because I knew it had potential. I didn’t think she’d still be interested since I had nothing new to offer.
To my surprise, she was so excited to hear this! She said she couldn’t stop thinking about SOME THINGS, SOMEDAY and was soooo happy to hear it was still available. That after much thought, she wanted to work with me on it and wanted to SIGN ME AND REPRESENT ME AS MY AGENT if I was still willing…
ughhhhh what!?!?
I did not see this one coming!!
She called.
We talked about possible edits/revisions and the game plan.
We finally saw each other eye to eye.
She expressed that she’d looked me up to see if the book had sold already and kept thinking about their story—Michel and Aicha—the kind of story you can’t forget. That she truly believed in me as a writer and the potential in SOME THINGS, SOMEDAY and future works.
I accepted the offer.
Crazy huh? I got my agent when I wasn’t trying to get one anymore.
That’s my story!
About SOME THINGS, SOMEDAY:
SOME THINGS, SOMEDAY is a gripping, coming -of-age, love story in which the characters experience loss of dreams, heartbreak, sacrifice, and ultimately, love. It also explores the immigrant life, as well as the sacrifices we make for the American dream.
Books are a part of who I am. Long before TikTok and Bookstagram.
Why am I reading? How come? It’s like asking me why am I breathing. I suppose I don’t know how not to be reading! Even when I’m going through a slump and think to myself that I won’t read for a while, sooner than later my heart aches and I start to feel anxious.
Reading is cool now? There was a time when it wasn't. In fact, I used to be ashamed of being a reader—ashamed of being me: A reader. Bookworm. Bibliophile. Book lover. Buveur d’encre.
I used to be ashamed for always having a book with me or wanting to escape the room to go read. Those close to me, they know that I have always loved reading, even before #bookstagram (book community on Instagram) became a thing. It has been a part of who I am since I can remember.
So why the shame in reading?
Well, my siblings can tell you that I’ve always been the weird/awkward kid. I preferred my own company and staying in my room all the time. It seems that as I got older and started teaching and writing, I somewhat found my voice and became more comfortable being myself. But growing up, I preferred to write in my journals with music in my ears or stereo and sticking my nose in a book any chance I could.
Books are my companions. I think part of the reason is simply because books gave me comfort. When I moved to the U.S from France (I was 10), it was quite a culture shock and I seemed to have a harder time adjusting to life in the states than my siblings did. I still do! Lol. My personality & passions just vibe better with France. So, in a way, I turned to books as escapism. And it has been that way since. I only read fiction growing up; it wasn’t until I went to grad school (2011) that I started reading more nonfiction.
Okay, so why was I ashamed of being a reader?
It wasn’t cool. Plain and simple. I will not sugarcoat it. As a Congolese, I hardly met or knew anyone in my community (Congolese community of Dallas) who loved reading besides two of my cousins (one who re-introduced me to books when I first moved to the states!)
For example: As a PK (Preacher’s kid), I grew up in church and was always in church for something. One day, I was sitting in a church pew reading a YA novel as the choir rehearsed. I was probably about fourteen then. I remember one of the elders of the church coming up to me asking what I was reading. When I showed him, he asked: “Why? Is it for school?” He inquired, baffled.
I told him that it wasn’t for school. Just for fun. He stared at me with a perplexed look on his face. He seemed to have a hard time processing the fact that I was reading for fun. In our household, reading was normal. My dad is a reader and my sisters also read here and there.
At school, it was the same thing. In between classes or before classes started (sometimes during), I was reading. I wasn’t a popular kid or anything, and in fact preferred to remain invisible, but for some reason the fact that I was always reading is what got people to notice me.
I remember some of the “popular” basketball/football players being intrigued and often interrupting (yes, interrupting) my reading time and asking what I was reading or how come I was always reading.
I guess I have a hard time processing this question:
Why am I reading? How come?
It’s like asking me why am I breathing? I suppose I don’t know how not to be reading! Even when I’m going through a slump and think to myself that I won’t read for a while, sooner than later my heart aches and I start to feel anxious—like something is missing. And as soon as I pick up a book, the aches and anxiety vanish.
Perhaps for me, reading means a lot more than for others.
Books are my companions
Reading is my escape
Reading is a stress reliever
Reading calms my anxiety/stress
Reading helps me see myself in others
Reading teaches me about the world and those around me
Reading helps me travel to places I could never go to physically
I also used to be ashamed to admit how much I really read to avoid making other people feel bad. And I don’t read nearly as much as I used to before kids. But people would make me feel bad for reading and would say things such as:
“You must have time on your hands to be reading this much.”
“You’re just showing off how many books you read.”
Well, both statements sound a bit passive aggressive. For one, anyone can make time for reading. Think about how much time you spend on social media, YouTube or watching TV?
I also am on social media and watch TV occasionally, but I make reading a priority. Reading should be something you enjoy doing—not something you are forced to do. And I’m one of those gifted readers who trained her brain long ago to multitask, so I can read with noise in the background and even music in my ears. Most people need complete silence to read.
Secondly, I have always been passionate about talking about books and sharing what I’m reading with others. When I share about how many books I read, it’s not about showing off the number of books I read. It’s more about challenging myself to read more and meeting said challenge, as well as encouraging and challenging others to read more, especially my fellow Congolese.
All this to say…..um, I’m not sure actually. I don’t have a call to action or anything, but I felt it was important I write this. I’m sure there’s a lone wolf/passionate reader who can relate.
Just be you.
Thanks for reading! It felt nice to blog again after so long.
The Road Less Traveled- Ask Questions & Face Your Pain
I don’t advise that anyone reads this book unless they are ready to be challenged mentally, spiritually, and emotionally.
I personally have been avoiding dealing with certain things-mentally and spiritually—simply because of the pain and suffering that comes with facing our problems. This book just completely broke me but also gave me courage and enlightenment and wisdom. I have probably highlighted or underlined 90% of the book.
“We cannot obtain an answer by not asking the questions.”
I have reached a place in life where I am deconstructing everything I have learned growing up to hopefully reconstruct it in a way that actually makes sense to me. Often times, we are told not to ask questions about things we don’t understand. Things that surpass our understanding. I don’t agree with this. I think we all ought to be asking questions. And seeking more knowledge and wisdom to grow.
“The path of spiritual growth is a path of lifelong learning.”
Five years ago I would have fallen asleep trying to read books on spiritual growth so cheers to more growth. Happy weekend!
Caring too much is what’s breaking me.
I care too much; that’s my problem. And when I give my all into something or truly care about friendships/relationships/people who I later realize don’t seem to give a toss about me, that definitely is an eye-opener and opportunity for me to re-evaluate who I let close to my heart.
Today I woke up reflecting on the essence of time and place. What a way to start the day. I’ve been sorta sick lately so lying in bed/couch deep in thought seems to bring me comfort. I was thinking about how in a matter of minutes, hours, or days, things have the ability to change instantly. Whether that’s flying to a different continent to immerse yourself in a new culture, saying something to someone that changes the dynamic of a relationship, making a decision that changes the course of your life, or making the wrong turn while driving. Your life can change entirely–good or bad.
Not really sure where I’m going with this, but I suppose I’ve been in my head a lot these days, thinking about the most random things. That’s quarantine for you.
Last week was a foggy week for me. Time just seems to keep slipping through my fingers. I had a hard time keeping up with which day of the week it was. In fact, when Friday came around, I truly thought we were still mid-week.
What is something you’ve said or done lately that has negatively affected your life or relationship with others in an unexpected way? Would you have imagined this ever happening, let’s say: weeks, months, or even years ago?
I’m learning that I can’t control every situation or how people choose to react to things I’ve said or done. All I can do is learn from the situation. I also can’t control people’s perception of me. All I can do is keep growing to be better and try to live the best way I know how to. I also can’t read people’s minds. All I can do is try to understand others the best way I can.
They say cancers (my zodiac) signs have a big heart. A heart so big that it sometimes hurts them in return because people often take advantage of their “niceness.” I’m not really into astrology, but I agree with this 100%.
I care too much; that’s my problem. And when I give my all into something or truly care about friendships/relationships/people who I later realize don’t seem to give a toss about me, that definitely is an eye-opener and opportunity for me to re-evaluate who I let close to my heart.
People tell me not to change. I am who I am.
They say caring too much is what makes me who I am. I’m starting to think caring too much is what’s breaking me.
So what is this blog post about again? I have no idea. I guess time, place, and something about splitting myself open and caring too much.
I know someone out there can relate though.
Until next time…
“i didn’t know why
i split myself open
for other knowing
sewing myself up
hurts this much
afterward”
― Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey
Let me wrap up by saying that, I know it’s been a long time since I wrote anything on here. I’ve been wondering if blogging is dead? Some would say yes, but others would disagree. I don’t think it is entirely dead. So long as people are searching for answers online, blogging will always be alive. So long as people have something to say, blogging shall live on!
Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins- Book Review
What a hidden gem of a treasure found in Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins. Can’t Hurt Me is packed with wisdom and hard truth (and emotional hardships he faced) David’s story is simply remarkable. He didn’t let his past dictate his future and chose to go above and beyond in everything. I can’t wrap my head around his strength–physically and mentally. It’s mind-boggling.
Everything in life is a mind game! Whenever we get swept under by life’s dramas, large and small, we are forgetting that no matter how bad the pain gets, no matter how harrowing the torture, all bad things end. That forgetting happens the second we give control over our emotions and actions to other people, which can easily happen when pain is peaking.
-David Goggins
What a hidden gem of a treasure found in Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins. Can’t Hurt Me is packed with wisdom and hard truth (and emotional hardships he faced) David’s story is simply remarkable. He didn’t let his past dictate his future and chose to go above and beyond in everything. I can’t wrap my head around his strength–physically and mentally. It’s mind-boggling.
I have already recommended this book to all those close to me: brothers, cousins, friends etc so I definitely recommend this book to you ALL (even more so than the last book I posted about earlier this week), especially to those of you who are obsessed/addicted to hard work & achieving goals/dreams –those who never stop grinding–even when the odds are against you.
“There will always be the 1 percent of us who are willing to put in the work to defy the odds.”
“Motivation is crap. Motivation comes and goes. When you’re driven, whatever is in front of you will get destroyed.”
Just a small disclaimer: lots of foul language.
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F – Book Review
I know the book title makes it seem like the book is literally about not giving a f about anything, but it’s actually quite the opposite which is in a way contradicting. You’ll see for yourself. I think it’s worth a read if you can get by all the foul language.
Had to see what the hype was all about! Let’s talk about The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F.
Everything we think and feel about a situation ultimately comes back to how valuable we perceive it to be.”
Out of all the books I have read recently, this is the only one that caught my husband’s attention. Ha. A line that made me ponder about my life.👇🏾
— “Our values determine the nature of our problems, and the nature of our problems determine the quality of our lives…..- Mark Manson
Hmmmm …felt that.
So I’ll be honest, I wasn’t too sure about this one at first. Took me a while to get into it. The first quarter just has too much swearing for my taste so I almost didn’t continue. I picked it back up a few days later and it got better (more depth) as I kept reading. Spent my Sunday afternoon finishing it. There were many moments of reflection and self-evaluation on my end, as well as highlighted texts.
I know the book title makes it seem like the book is literally about not giving a f about anything, but it’s actually quite the opposite which is in a way contradicting. You’ll see for yourself. I think it’s worth a read if you can get by all the foul language.
Books I Read in 2020: 32 Books
Here are all the books I read (excluding the ebooks and the ones I gave away.) I may read one more by 2021. It was a difficult year so reading was truly an escape.
📚 Books I Read this year: 32 books.
Here are all the books I read (excluding the ebooks and the ones I gave away.) I may read one more by 2021. It was a difficult year so reading was truly an escape.
My goal was to read 35 books, so I was very close!!
Below are my favorite reads this year split into genres:
Literary fiction: Homegoing by Yaa Gyasi and The Girl with the Louding Voice by @abidare_author and Purple Hibiscus by @chimamanda_adichie
Upmarket/Women’s fiction: No Time To Blink by @dina.silver
Romance: The Trouble With Hating You by @sajnipatelbooks & Dear John by @nicholassparks
Thriller/Mystery/Suspense: My Sister The Serial Killer by @oyinbraithwaite & Mr. Perfect by Linda Howard
Non fiction/Biography: The Other Wes Moore by @iamwesmoore & The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin.
For 2021, I hope to read more nonfiction and more books in French-at least five novels in the French language. I’ve lost the habit!
I have been a lover of books since I was just a little girl. I got my love of reading from my dad. He reads a lot as well. I hope to encourage more people to read–especially Congolese, so I was overjoyed when my post made an impact in the Congolese community on Twitter! We need to kill the saying about “Black people don’t read”-especially Congolese. We do read!
Books are the quietest and most constant of friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of counselors, and the most patient of teachers.– Charles W. Eliot
I am Restored by Lecrae Book Review
When we’re at our lowest point, our problems appear magnified and are all we can see. Our mindset becomes dominated by the pain of the moment we’re in. We can’t see anything other than what we’re facing.
When we’re at our lowest point, our problems appear magnified and are all we can see. Our mindset becomes dominated by the pain of the moment we’re in. We can’t see anything other than what we’re facing.”- @lecrae
I’ve been “following” Lecrae’s journey and been a fan of his music for a very long time (’05).
I saw the shift in his music and personally started to appreciate and love it more over the years. I felt like it was more real. Raw. Authentic.
This memoir “I am Restored” is very transparent and is packed with wisdom. Lecrae discusses many important topics, such as church hurt, racism, views on evangelical Christianity, the music industry, trauma, depression, spiritual darkness, and a lot more that I could relate to! As someone who grew up in the church, I could relate so much to some of the disappointment Lecrae faced with evangelical Christianity.
I felt every emotion. Every word. Only God can truly restore our souls.
I highly recommend this one!
HOW TO MAKE TIME FOR READING? WHAT ARE MY ALL-TIME FAVORITES?
Start by reading one chapter a day. In this day and age of social media addiction, we have to sacrifice and make time for the things we want or like.
A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies . . . The man who never reads lives only one.
– George R.R. Martin
For those who personally know me or follow me on social media, it is no surprise that I LOVE READING. Reading has always been my #1 passion and my escape from the world. Books are my companions. Through reading, I have learned more about the world and the people in it. From the comfort of my couch/bed, I traveled the world and learned about places and cultures. Through reading, I became a better writer as well.
There is a question I get so often that I decided to dedicate a blog post to it:
How can one read more? How can one become a ‘reader’?
My answer is and always will be:
Make time for reading. Read what you like–not what you think you should be reading.
Start by reading one chapter a day. In this day and age of social media addiction, we have to sacrifice and make time for the things we want or like. For me, I sacrifice watching TV or being on social media to read. You have to make time for what you care about, even though it can be difficult. Instead of scrolling through social media to pass time when you’re bored, pick up a book. If you work a 9-5, read during lunch, or set a time right before bed. If you’re a stay-at-home/work-at-home parent, like most of us right now (lol), read when your kids are taking a nap.
How to know what you like to read?
I suggest you try and buy/borrow a few books in different genres to have a feel of what you think you like to read: fiction or nonfiction? science fiction or literary fiction? business books or self-help? religious perspectives or not? There are such wide-ranging books to choose from.
For me, I prefer to read fiction and memoirs (non-fiction). As far as fiction, I mostly enjoy books that have an international theme/appeal. It can be romance, literary fiction, or contemporary women’s fiction. I occasionally read thrillers (especially ones about marriage/family). I enjoy reading diverse stories from diverse writers. Back in my middle school and high school days, there weren’t many of those books getting published, so I read them every chance I get; authors such as Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Yaa Gyassi, Etaf Rum etc. This doesn’t mean I don’t read books by white authors because I do as well, specifically Emily Giffin, Liane Moriarty, and Dina Silver.
Diverse voices were silenced, but are on the rise today.
For nonfiction, I enjoy memoirs. I am not a fan of self-help books, but I do occasionally read books on spiritual living.
So what are my top 5 all-time favorite books?
A Time for Dancing by Davida Wills Hurwin
I read this when I was in high school. At the time, I was a dancer so I loved books that talked about the lives of dancers. A movie was even made out of this book. Such a beautiful story.
Americanah by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
If you have not heard of this one, where have you been? I could relate so much to this book as an immigrant to this country. It is the kind of book that makes you think and laugh at the same time: profound + humorous conversations about the immigrant life in the diaspora (UK and U.S.)
Homegoing by Yaa Gyassi
Ahhhhhh, this book was life-changing for me. All I can say is that you will not regret reading this! We often forget what our ancestors had to go through for us to have the freedom we have today, but this book is much more than that. Seven descendants of two half-sisters tell their stories (one in Ghana and one as a slave in America). It all comes full circle at the end.
Kindred by Octavia Butler
This was actually assigned in my African-American lit class in college but ended up being one of my fav slave narratives ever. It really transports you to those times and taught me a lot about slavery in America (what they don’t teach in schools).
Hand-me-Down Heartache by TJ Butler
I read this while I was in high school. I finished it all in one night. The writer may not be the most popular writer, but this book touched my heart in so many ways at the perfect time. I was going through a rough time so it just really inspired me when I needed it the most, so it remained one of my all-time favs.
Some books leave us free and some books make us free.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
All right, folks, I hope this blog post was helpful! What do you struggle with the most when it comes to reading? Share some of your favorite books!
Until next time,
Deb
HOW DID YOU FALL IN LOVE WITH READING?
There is something about reading that takes you into another world. That feeling when you’re so lost in a book and can’t seem to stop flipping the pages.
Books and doors are the same thing. You open them, and you go through into another world.
~Jeanette Winterson
Today, I read. For hours. And it felt pretty darn good.
I remember the day like it was yesterday. Well, there are two occasions. One was when I was about seven or eight. I was living in Paris, France at the time. My dad had some errands to run in the city and I got to with him. I remember coming across a bookstore and begged for us to go inside. Once in the bookstore, I came across a book that I couldn’t let go of so my dad purchased it for me. I carried that book with me everywhere. I read that story over and over again. Then one day, I couldn’t find this precious book of mine. I searched everywhere, but never found it. I cried about it and pouted, but it didn’t bring the book back. I think I’m still a bit sad about losing that book until today. I just never found it again. Then I grew older and didn’t like to read as much anymore when I moved to the U.S. Because of the culture shock and language barrier, reading didn’t interest me as much anymore. That is, until freshman year of high school. I have a cousin who read everywhere. It was annoying but she always told me that I was missing out. So one day I decided to start reading “for fun” again. And I fell in love with words again. That night, there was a mouse in the house, so my siblings and I were all scared to leave our rooms. I didn’t want to turn the lights off in my room in fear that the mouse would “get me” (don’t judge me! ), so I stayed up all night and read Hand Me – Down Heartache by TJ Butler. It didn’t matter that I had school the next morning. I was lost in a new world. That day marks the moment I fell in love with reading again.
Reading is my escape from it all. I just wish I could make more time for it like I used to.
There is something about reading that takes you into another world. That feeling when you’re so lost in a book and can’t seem to stop flipping the pages. That feeling you get when you finish a book but the characters are still with you.
All morning I struggled with the sensation of stray wisps of one world seeping through the cracks of another. Do you know the feeling when you start reading a new book before the membrane of the last one has had time to close behind you? You leave the previous book with ideas and themes — characters even — caught in the fibres of your clothes, and when you open the new book, they are still with you.
~Diane Setterfield, The Thirteenth Tale
I read to unwind, relax, and escape. Hopefully, it will remain the same always.
What about you? How did you fall in love with reading?